(A)ddy, (B)oard + (C)halkABC

Goodbye 2 Jujur

2007-10-02T23:52:00.000-07:00

I have to admit that my favourite class in SMK BB is 2 Jujur...my kids, my fellow Jujurians (as they call themselves). When i was given a class of form 2 i thought that it would be easy and i'll pretty much get bored. Thankfully my kids manage to intrigued me as well as keep me occupied. We had intense discussions, enthusiastic learning, and nothing less than fun. From the reaction (Wafa, Karen, Annerjit, and Jess crying), the many cards, and presents i have gotten, i can conclude that my departure is not something they were looking forward to. All i know is that i went there , teach what i know, and hope that they'll do the best in everything. I wass ent to them like they were to me and it's been a great pleasure getting to know them one by one. If only i had more time that would be better but as we all know, time waits for no man, not even me. When i saw their video messages that they made, filmed by Ms. Remender, i felt really sad. I felt sad because i had to leave them and at the same time touched because they appreciate all i have done. The 12 weeks that i have spent with them hasn't actually been a breeze but they are something i am going to keep in memory forever...if there is such thing as forever. Here are the photos i have taken of the last day.

These are my boys:

try to "control macho"...you guys know who you are...*wink*~ LOL!!!
and these are my girls:

Don't be fooled by those angelic smiles or innocent eyes...

The camera shy...Melissa

But she finally shows her face...

A little encouragement goes a long way, huh??

A little bit of drama wouldn't hurt...

The return of the bimbos...doesn't this remind you of a scene from "Mean Girls" or "Clueless"??

A scene from "Stab 3"...scary movie, anyone?

Ultra man meets batman meets spiderman meets cicakman...power rangers??

The prefects and prefects only- CLUB!!

Life is a gamble so is everything else

I am the dealer...the rest of you players...place your bets!!!

PN. Ong is coming...come on wrap it up y'all~LOL!!!

Ram wanted to sweep the floor and why is Jegah so blur???

Put the scissors away...my hair is short enough thank you very much!

Say no to drugs...or else you'll be worst than this!

Choo..choo...

Now...with the teacher...Mr. Adrian Lim

Ms. Remender...isn't she lovely??

Here are the vidoes

Kids...that's all! I love you guys and always stay in touch. Thank you again for giving me that joy in teaching.

Thursday with Remy

2007-09-30T22:25:00.000-07:00

I spent most of Thursday (27th September, 2007) following Ms. Remender Kaur around taking pictures of her kids and help them make their video messages for her. Here is the product!

This is Ms. Remender Kaur...and no she is not a model...not yet...LOL!!!

This is 4 Dedikasi

They are showing their studious side...yeah right!! Actually they are camera shy.

They made a video message for Ms. Rememder and i thought they were pretty sincere, creative, dramatic, and very funny.

So, what do you guys think? Now, i am going to introduce you to her bunch of little mischievous devils in 1 Tabah...LOL!! They appeared to be very sweet.

When we walked into the class, we saw this on the board. I was touched because i only entered the class when i was given relief classes and when i taught them a little art for the last few weeks. I felt appreciated.

These pictures reminded me of the old fashion way of taking a class photo...just that the kids were that comical in the past.

These are their video dedication and it's refreshing as well as touching. Aww...the kids love you Remender.

Spending time with 2 Inovasi

2007-09-30T21:24:00.001-07:00

Besides following Ms. Remender around, i also had classes with 2 Inovasi. I spent the first period doing revision with them and then we had a photo taking session. They also made a video message for me. When i got home and saw it, i have to say that i am very touched with what they have said. Truth be told, i was pretty strict with them and i think to a certain level they feared me as much as they dislike me. However, i got to learned that that's untrue. I do love them and care about their well being despite the fact that they are weak academically as well as behaviour wise. But, when i was given that class, i told myself i'd do whatever it takes to make them better and i think i managed to achieved what i have set out to do. If only they'd put it more effort and stop being lazy, they can improve themselves. I am going to miss them.

Introducing:

My boys in 2 Inovasi

My girls of 2 Inovasi

Now, it's time they show you what they are made off...

They are still controlling the way they pose...you haven't see more...you'd be surprised!!

My girls posing like they are on America's next top model...work it!! (Very Fat-Hoa)

Awwwwww...aren't they adorable???

Ain't misbehavin'

Amirul acting all macho 3 is the in things...perhaps!!

Time to pose with Mr. Adrian Lim

Tamil and Ruffy

Just us boys

Sitting around in this classrom

Crazy kids

Dancing with the stars...sort of!

Get in line...now!!!

This is their video message:

Today is Wednesday

2007-09-26T09:03:00.000-07:00

I love the weather today...i just hope that it doesn't rain before i reach school. It can go ahead and rain after that and indeed it did...like cats and dogs with string guts of wind, the surrounding of the classroom dimming as the dark clouds came rolling in. Today is already Wednesday.

The whole morning, i was busy marking my kids' spelling. In 2 Jujur, 17 of them got 100%, scoring nothing less that excellence. Some of them scored 90-98%, while one scored 77% while another failed only at 44%, due to the fact that he didn't study. As for 2 Inovasi, i have 3 students who passes, the highest scoring 77%. The rest failed miserably. However, there were only 12 of them altogether. This was due to their sheer laziness. I am ok with the results because i didn't expected so many to score the perfect 100%. My underestimating them has proven to be incorrect. All and all i am quite happy.

As for the collage i asked them to do too, they were good at it, scoring a 9/10. The first time some of them did it, they didn't make a collage and i asked them to redo. Most did well. I am impressed. My students are capable of some form of art after all. They are very good with tying the pictures with the themes of "The Phantom of the Opera". I hope that they can carry themselves as well as they have during the exams.

Today too, before entering 2 Jujur for four periods, Pn. Ong Bee Bee invited Remender and i for a drink. There we talked to her a lot and she gave use a lot fo free useful advice. I find her to be a women of poise and of class. WOW!! It's an honour to have met her. Anyway, the reason i had four classes back to back with 2 Jujur was because they wanted me to stay since once of their teachers were absent. No teachers were set to relief the class. So, i decided to spend some time talking to my kids, offering them advice and tell them some stories in relation to my real life experience. I feel that i have shared a lot from my childhood to my dreams. All and all it was fun and i am glad that i spend 2 extra classes with them. It's a good day and despite my tiredness, i am still blogging.

That's all for today. Goodnight!

How?

2007-09-25T01:55:00.000-07:00

I was supposed to go take a nap but i couldn't. All i could think about was my students. In 3 more days to come, we'll be parting ways and i guess most of them, i'll never see again. Despite the fact that they are silly, mischievous, playful, intelligent, smart, creative, wise, lazy, artistic, inquisitive, wonderful, superb, hard-working, funny, and all that they are, no matter what they are, i love them from the bottom of my heart. Tears are building up as my mind are replaying their faces and actions in scenes in black and white like in olden movies. I see them smile, i see them seeking my permission, i see them tired, i see them frustrated, i see them working hard, i see them laughing, i see them...all of them. I can hear how Kavinash, Amirudeen, Alyani, and Shairah would ask me to clarify things, while Ram, Denise, and Melissa ask if they can do certain things their ways, Zi Yang and Maisarah apologized to me for disturbing the lesson, Annerjit, Farah, and Jegah ask for permission to go for their recess since they are prefects, and how they have progressed as i teach them. Deep sigh!

During the last two period today with 2 Jujur, i took about five minutes to talk to them about the tragedy of Nurin. Karen was laughing and i told her that the idea of getting rape is not funny. She managed to contain herself and pay attention. Then, i went on to telling them that they have to take good care of themselves because out there there are psychotic people waiting to strike. I told them to be careful especially when they are going out with friends. Then, Jemimah asked what if she is just making her way home. I told her to be extra careful too. As i was advising them, in my mind, i try to imagined my kids suffer the same fate or something similar to Nurin~ I can't. I can't see them get hurt. They are just so young and so much is ahead of them. I worry about them...

Tears streaming down my cheeks. My eyes are blurry. I have a confession to make. I have been putting up this facade saying that i am beginning to let go but deep down i can't find the will in me to let them go. All i have left are these few days and the memories that they have given me. I am sad! Whimper. Inhale. I wonder if i am going to have an emotional breakdown on Friday. I am so afraid of making a fool out of myself. I thought i could play it cool but i am afraid that i can't.

There will be no more writing lesson plans, office politics, or the fact that i have to wake up early to catch the freaking bus...but there won't be students anymore...or office gossips. How?

Fellow teachers talking about Nurin ='(

One more

2007-09-22T23:34:00.000-07:00

One more week to go
one more act on show
one more lesson to follow
one more trick i know.

One more time to soar
one more rhythm to flow
one more whistle to blow
one more book to borrow.

One more reason to say no
one more question below
one more bird, the crow?
One more chance for us to grow.

One more person to bore
one more value too low
one more driver too slow
one more boat to row

One more teacher saying "so"
one more light showing glow
one more cat showing claw
one more student breaking law.

One more day to the core
One more land to sow
One more wood to saw
One more taste too raw.

One more
one more
soon they'll be no more
all gone no more.

P/S: I am a little down but i am glad too!!

S for sickness, M for Medicine, and C for cure

2007-09-18T22:18:00.000-07:00

This is the second time i have missed school. The first time was last week when i woke up and gotten dressed just to feel sick and unable to travel. You see, i need to wake up at 5 and leave the house by 6 to catch a bus from my place, Pantai Hill Park, to Bangsar LRT station (U74/ 46D). Then, from there, i need to catch another bus from the station to the bus stop opposite Bangsar Shopping Centre (u634). Then, it's about 10 minutes of walking before reaching the school. Due to my sudden weakness in my limbs, i wasn't able to travel in the rainy weather. I decided to call the principal and told her about my condition. Moreover, i don't have any classes on Mondays. Traveling can be a b****!!!

However, today, i just couldn't get up. I took my medicine last night and before i knew it, i was knocked out. Yesterday despite my sicky feeling, i attended school. For the first half of the morning, i just sat in the staff room trying to rest. I bet the teachers thought i have been out partying or something and that was why i was tired. Actually, it was the meds. They made me drowsy and i was weak to the point that i was shivering. My hands were shaking and drinking a cup of coffee from the canteen didn't help at all. The bug which started last week is still here. I have taken my meds- completing the dosage of antibiotic for my phlegmy throat, almost finish my cough meds, and finished my strip of flu meds...but i am still sick. The bug is not on 24 hours. It comes on and then goes off. I have taken countless packets of Strepsils and Fishermen's friend to soothe my throat but the curing process is taking hell of a time.

I am going to take my meds as i have just had my lunch...porridge. Anyway, i am feeling all shaky again and i need to rest. I hope to be able to go to school tomorrow...i have a class to teach and it's my last evaluation. Well or not, i have to bring it!!

Touched

2007-09-12T04:59:00.000-07:00

Last Friday was the last day i'll ever see Hannah Azuree as far as my internship goes. She is one of my kids in 2 Jujur. I could recall the first day i walked into the class. I asked them to introduced themselves and after that i asked if they has any questions for me. Some questions were thrown at me then i asked, after a while of silence, "Any more questions? Anybody?" and Hannah raised her hands. "Ah! You!", i said and she asked, "Teacher, can we just get on with today's lesson?" I was stunned because i didn't expect that kind of question. So, i asked the class if they wanted to move on to the lesson and they all answered yes. Mind you, it's the first day i walked into class and their thirst for knowledge was just unexpected.

As i got to know the class as well as Hannah better, some days, i feel that Hannah can be the little pest that she wants to be or be the companion i turn too when they the rest of the class decides to be mischievous. Sometimes, Hannah would irritate and annoy me and to get her attention, i'd ask her "Hannah are you surviving?" She'd then keep quite and ponder a moment or two before asking, "Why do you always ask me that, teacher?" and i'd say "Because i just want to know if you are coping fine. You seem to be asking Annerjit and Karen a lot of questions, so perhaps you are struggling. I don't know really. Therefore, i am just making guesses that you are finding the tasks challenging ." She'd answer defensively, "No teacher. I am alright!"

Hannah is a bright girl with braces. She has perfect fair skin with brunette curly locks which she tames in a bunchy pony tail style. She is slim and slender and she likes to smile. Her cheeks are rosy and she loves attention. She is very artistic and like getting the chance to speak. Some times, i get her confused with Karen. Hannah is mixed too, but she is a Muslim. She told me last Thursday that she'll be going on a vacation to L.A, New York, and Las Vegas until the 28th of September and she'll only be back to school on the following Monday. That means last Friday was the last day i saw her.

She came and see me personally because she wanted to show me something. She round up a group of friends and performed (sang and danced for me) "We are all in this together" from the crazed film "high school musical". They did their routine twice after i commented that they needed to put in more energy in their performance. They are pretty good for their age and i enjoyed watching the so-called "show". Then, i thanked them for giving me the private show. You see, they were supposed to perform on the eve of Merdeka but somehow or rather they have to pull out at the very last minute. I told Hannah how disappointed i was and so she decided to call all the buddies and perform it just for me.

After that little show, i told them to go back to class. Then, Hannah told me that she has something to give me. She opened her file and pulled out a yellow envelope. In it was a card. I was so touch and thanked her. When she walked away, she turned back and looked at me for the last time, flashed me her million dollar smile, and waved goodbye. I waved back too. I only moved from where i stood when she disappeared into another block. When i got back to the staff room, i opened the card. She wrote and i quote

"Dear Mr. Adrian,
I hope you achieve your dream in becoming a singer or teacher. Success comes to people who never stop dreaming, who trust that their dreams can come true, who use each new chance that each day brings their way. Best wishes to you for following your DREAMS!

Good Luck,
Hannah,
2 Jujur, class of 2007,
SMK.Bukit Bandaraya"

As i read those words, i was holding my tears back. Hello...i was in the staff room and i couldn't possibly be showing my soft side. I was wondering if i could skip the last day. I might not be able to get through it with people saying good bye and stuff. My kids are a blessing and i think i met them for a reason and they met me too for a reason. They inspire me everyday and i hope i am a good teacher to them...not just in English but as someone whom they can learn from. I am already missing Hannah!!!

P/S: Just so you know, it wasn't a cheap card. It's Hallmark's.

Politics

2007-09-05T05:30:00.000-07:00

No matter where you are, there will be politics. You've watched reality shows like "Survivor", "America's next top model" and so on and so forth. If people on the show fight like cats and dogs what makes you think that things would be any less different at your work place. In the work place it is even worst! Haven't you heard, it's a dog eat dog world or if you must, the wild where we are test to see to remains as the fittest survivor.

Remember when you were little children, back in your primary years, when you have your own group of friends which you stick with as if you guys were glued at birth, or formed allies because you were not happy about a certain someone? Well, truth is, in my school, in the teacher's room, to be exact, we have that ourselves. You turn to the left to the right to the front and even the back, you can see teachers sitting in clans gossiping about the ones they despise. I have observed the fragile way they whisper and their faces change with dramatic emotions, usually angry as the flame of hate lit up brightly in their eyes. The way they mimic their enemies' gestures and voice make they seem like little school children at the playground doing something silly.

Well, they are many groups, among them, there are:

1. The "cool" 'chers- consist of mixed race and they are the ones respected by students and are out-spoken.
2. The "outcast"- Also, known as the charmed ones- wannabes, consists of the typical Chinese teachers who has only 3 lifetime members on the team, one is in feud with most of the "cool" 'chers due to the fact that she thinks they are easy to pick on until a "cool" 'cher defended herself verbally. (By the way, this is what inspires this post)
3. The "men only" club- consists of most of the male teachers (mostly Indians).
4. The "rejects"- consists of a group of teachers who are rejected by the senior teachers because they lack social skills. They are the ones who can't really control the class and 2 of their members are pregnant.
5. The "kakak-kakak" club- consists of a group of female Malay teachers who refers to themselves as "ah kak" and love laughing aloud behind the stuff room when they have their free periods. I find them very superficial...you know, "ah kak" here and "ah kak" there.
6. The invincible- consists of teachers who are in their own world and are too busy with work that they don't have the time to socialize. They are very low profile and they are the ones who are less talked about.
7. The interns- That's of course Remender and i! We are the most fabulous people you'll ever meet and our group consists only the both of us. We also know who to stick with like the "cool" 'chers.

Recently, the First assistant Principal has been appointed to be a principal in a new school. Remender and i were in talks with some of the "cool" 'chers and they told us that due to her sudden departure, most teachers decided to take back their application for transfer. That's how bad it is. Unfortunately, having hypocrisy as one of Malaysian's most distinctive value, we are not only throwing her an assembly for her, but a dinner too at some expensive hotel. I just don't get it. What's the point of suck-upping when she is not going to be in school anymore? Why go through all that trouble for someone you guys dislike? I really don't understand. If they were throwing a party or something to celebrate her going away that'd be nice.

In our school too, it seems that some of the teachers are not fit to teach. This is because they suffer mental illnesses (You should look at my face. I am darn serious and i am not joking...not even a bit). However, they refuse to seek medical treatment. The feud i mentioned above happened because of one's illnesses. She can't control her angry and stress level therefore takes it out on her fellow colleagues-cum-enemies. The school is not peaceful because of all these politics. It's like dealing with the students disciplinary problems alone aren't enough...we have our own very spectacle in the teacher's room.

I can't believe it!

2007-08-28T07:00:00.000-07:00

"I can't believe it!"

"I can't believe it!"
Uttered twice for emphasis by Ahmad Zakwan who was sitting in the Rapid K.L bus number u74. I have talked to him before. The first time was when we were on our way back home also, on the same bus. We have broken the ice the first time we spoke about our family and his hobbies. This marks our second interaction out of the school grounds, so we chat about something slightly different like lunch and the merdeka preparation. Ahmad, as i'd like to call him, is a jovial boy, with a lean frame, average-ish in height for his age, dark as well as perfect skinned. Either he is active in sports or he is one lucky kid with very good genes. He is one of my kid in 2 Jujur, my good class.

Unlike the first time we ever got to chatting on the bus, i realized Ahmad was different. This time, this friendly boy who was quite shy is now very vocal. He asked me a lot of things ranging from where i was heading to to if i knew that Liyana and Asfvin (his classmates) were staying near us. Then, suddenly, he asked if he could ask me a personal question. I answered, "Why not!". At the back of my mind, i was thinking why didn't he asked me that in the first place. I smirk silently because he has been asking me a lot of questions like i was a witness to a crime or something equally exciting or that i was his student, his questions are there to prompt me to speak. "Hmmm...", i thought, "Somehow, that questions from him is like a cue telling me that he is about to ask me something very serious".

It's funny seeing how a young teenager speaks around us. They are not like kids anymore, saying all the darnest things. So, he popped the question. However, this question wasn't a straight forward question. It came with a scenario before he asked me the actual question. This is how it went.

"Last Friday or was it Saturday, i was on my way to school. It was in the afternnon, around 4 something, if i am not mistaken. Then, i saw a guy got on the bus near your stop. He was wearing a blue shirt, with outstanding stylishly done hair, big dark sunglasses, and had piercings..."

Ring a bell??

He continued, "Anyway, i was wondering if he is you teacher?"

"Mmmm...", a little hesitation from my side like to tell a lie or not.

Then it came out, "Yes. That was me. How come i didn't see you?"

"I was sitting behind you, teacher."

"Whoa! That was really you?"

"eermmm...yes it is!"

"I can't believe it! I can't believe it!"

When i told him that the person he saw was me, his face lit up even more. His eyes were glistening and a board smile we flashed before me. It wasn't that look of disappointment or anything of such. He was like an orphan who had finally found his parents, a lost dog discovering his way back to his master, or simply like Malaysia's independence day came early this year. It was an unforgettable sight...seeing how i have made Ahmad's day with the truth.

Missing the Workshop

2007-08-21T20:07:00.000-07:00

If you know me, you'd know by now, i am a person who (somehow) creates controversy or something relatively similar to that from the clothes i wear or the way i style my hair. Maybe it's the fact that i like attention, maybe. So, Feon is back in her home town and as for the rest of the class, i don't know anything about them. Derick definitely went and i think Rememder did too. The rest of you, i haven't a clue.

The reason i didn't want to go, was because i wasn't feeling well and on top of that, i had a new house mate moving in. So, i had a reason to stay home. However, even if i was well, i wouldn't have attended because i don't see the need of meeting up with people and go all "Hoohaa" over the whole can-you-believe-it-we-have-about-a-month-left or i-am-a-good-teacher-and-you-are-a-bad-on. I am not ready to swap storied yet. Perhaps i don't want to swap stories at all. I mean i have this blog here and if anyone wants to know anything about me or my internship, it's all here. I hate repeating myself, so this blog serves me very well.

I heard from Charlene that Dr. Ju was looking for me. Hmmm...(lines forming on my forehead, my smile almost gone, partial frowing, eyes squinting looking above like i was searching into the back of my brain for some legit reasons, lips, pouting) I wonder why? Did anyone missed me?

P/S: This is how i actually look when i go to school.

2nd Evaluation

2007-08-19T02:33:00.000-07:00

After a while of teaching, it doesn't matter to me if my lecturer comes or not to evaluate me. I guess i have gotten used to standing in front of the class, where the veto power absolutely belongs to me. I am getting quite comfortable now. Unlike Remender, she gets pissed off when our lecturer pull an I- stood-you-up trick on us. She hates it and it amuses me to a certain extend seeing her emotional side because i have never ever seen her like that. I can relate to her though. It doesn't mean that just because my lecturer is coming to evaluate me, i am going to work extra hard or that i will not do my best when she is not evaluating me. As far as doing work is concerned, when ever i step into the class, i make sure i deliver my best. I'll try to make my lessons as personal as possible so that i can have a good time. I have been evaluated for the second time and i am glad to announce that i have done pretty well, thus far. I have two more evaluation to go and i am ok with them. I think the pressure will only kick in when there is a second party involved in my evaluation if i am able to get an "A" for this. This is because I may not appeal entirely to the second person who will be evaluating me. However, i still want an "A". I do get stressed out on normal days but i can still maintain my composure. I don't know about the future though.

Clarify this.....please

2007-08-16T05:29:00.000-07:00

Alright! I have wanted to write this for quite some time now, but i haven't had the time or shall i say i haven't been finding time to write this. I have been down lately and i just haven't had the mood. My only escape from the trouble that surrounds me is my kids. When i walk into class, i forget everything and focus entirely on them. The just take me into another world.

Anyway, that's not what i wanted to write about. This is what i want to write about and i need some clarification. You see, on Monday, we had assembly and the discipline teacher, Pn. Ong, reminded the students to not colour their hair or spike it. Then, i think about my school days when i only got told off for adding temporary hot-red colour during sport's day back in 2001. Other than that, my hair was spiked and no one made a big deal out of it. However, the teachers here make a big deal out of everything. Out of curiosity, is this one of the many west Malaysians' ways? I don't know.

I mean what's does hair style got to do with studies? Is it proven scientifically that just because you have a punked-like hair you will fail in your exams. So much for wanting our kids to be creative and critical. What happened to being your own individual? What about the tolerance and respect we preach in our moral classes? What is all that about?? Hypocrisy? It's ok for someone to like flower arrangement and the colour pink, but when a person likes hairstyling or something else out of the norms, it becomes forbidden in schools and else where. I mean as long as it is not inflicting hurt and pain on others, it should be alright, shouldn't it?

August 6th 'till the 10th

2007-08-11T20:19:00.000-07:00

First and foremost, let me apologized for not keeping this blog updated. So sorry about that because i have been really busy with work and everything else. As you know, from where i last left off, i was talking about how dreadful 2 Inovasi is and thankfully, they are not that problematic this week. It's what i'd like to call- DISCIPLINE. I think by now, they are getting used to my way of teaching, where everything is very systematic from the writing of the days and dates in their exercise books to the way i give them in-class activities. They are ok...thus far. I was surprised that all of them handed in their books for marking. I told them that if they didn't, i'll hand in their names to Pn. Ong, the discipline teacher. I guess the tiger has scare the mouse out of them.

On Monday, we had assembly. In conjunction to the Merdeka celebration, we've invited A. Samad Said to our school. It was nice to see the prolific writer in the flesh. It was nice hearing him getting down to earth and talk about our independence day and his reflection on the past. It was really interesting. However, the fact that people who do things at the very last minute made the assembly disastrous. The mic wasn't working and the radio was just bad. I don't know who to put the blame on, but it was just terrible. It shows how last minute those who are in charge of the assembly were, the teachers as well as the students.

If i wasn't mistaken, on Wednesday, Pn. Ong got a tip that one of the form 5 students brought her hand phone to class. As a result from that, a surprise sport check was carried out. Guess what?? Yours truely (moi), managed to make it on the list as one of the fierce teachers in the school. It was an honour to be involved. It was really cool how 5 minutes before their trial exams end, we (about 10 of us (teachers)), led by Pn. Ong to the class room where they were having their exams. We went into the class which was converted into a hall by getting rid of the partitions. We were very swift which made me felt like i was on the S.W.A.T. team or something really cool. We closed all the doors and prefects were standing outside guarding the doors. As the exam ended, we conducted the spot check row by row, student by student. We asked them to empty their pockets and take off their shoes. Lucky for them, i found nothing illegal. However, other teachers managed to find hand phones as well as cigarettes. Pretty cool!!

On Friday, Pn. Huzaina was supposed to come and evaluate us. Somehow, something told me that she'd cancel. She did!! The following day, i told Remender and she cursed under her breathe. She has been working extra hard, knowing that she will be evaluated. I've never seen that side of her and it seemed pretty amusing to me. As for me, i was pretty relaxed. It didn't matter if she was coming or not. However, this coming week, she'll come on Friday. I hope that everything will go on well. I need to get to work on my lesson plans.

Oh NO!!

2007-08-07T03:43:00.000-07:00

"Oh No!!!"~ That is the title of the song I've written in regards to the anti-drug campaign month hosted in my school. If i am not mistaken, i think this campaign is carried out in schools throughout Malaysia. Anyway, i wrote this while i was in school. It was sort of life an inspiration. It's when i am the teacher giving my students advice of saying no to drugs. Along the lines, it's quite dramatic. I am having flu and sorethroat, so the vocal quality ain't that great. I tried but this is what i can give. Imagine if i was in professional recording studio.

verse 1:
Sniffin' up snow into your nose,
sniffin' content you don't even know,
making you do just about anything,
got you labeled as a crazy human being.

Bridge:
I know
sometimes life is too depressing
cause no one will listen to you and
there's nothing you can do
but this is not the way to be heading no
this is not the way to be heading.

Chorus:
Oh No
don't poison yourself.
Toxic running in your blood line.
Clouding you thoughts, actions turned into crimes.

Oh No
(You) gotta love yourself.
Stay safe behind the lines.
So you won't get into trouble even when troubled times.

Verse 2:
You're taking the E for ecstasy.
Thinking that you don't have nobody
by your side to always be there for you.
If you look harder you'll know that God loves you.

Bridge 2:
I know this life ain't easy
but you have gotta try to be strong
and avoid the wrongs.
Just keep your head up high and you'll do better.
Yes, keep your head up high and you'll do better.

Repeat chorus.

Breakdown:
If you think you will then you will.
If you think you can, then you can.
Have a little hope and a little bit of faith
goes a long way.
(Listen to all i've got to say)

The trouble with 2 Inovasi

2007-08-03T21:51:00.000-07:00

I just found out that 2 Inovasi is not just a weak class with students with discipline problems, but it is the last class. The First assistant principal happened to left that vital detail out. Maybe she happened to let it slipped her mind~ Ooops!!! Anyway, the trouble with them is they don't have any troubles, or that is what they told me. Maybe it's because they don't get enough love from home and when they are in school, they don't get enough attention. I really don't know, but i guess it's something along those lines.

Yesterday (Friday), from 11.10a.m to 12.30 p.m., i had a class with them. When i entered the class, there was only one student in sight. I waited for 5 minutes and asked him where they were and he told me that they are all in the office. The whole class?? What for?? Kesavan then told me that they have gotten into trouble (yet again) with the school's discipline teacher. Fine! After 30 minutes of sitting in an almost empty class, the students walked in one by one, strolling. As they entered the class, they just glide and sat in a big group at the back of the classroom. They had food and drinks in their hands and one of them told me that the discipline teacher had bought them those (food and drinks) and that was why they were late. Fine!

Neither did they apologized for being late nor did they greet me as they entered the class. All they did were make themselves comfortable at the back of the class, talking, and eating. As for the person in front, the teacher, they didn't seem to acknowledge my presence. On the board was some words written, "Success is 10% talent and 90% hard work and effort" and "If there is a will, they is a way". That was my set induction. They didn't even bother to ask me why aren't i teaching. We sat there for another 30 minutes. I was staring at them intensely. Only Amirul knew what to do, that was to go back to his place and get ready for the lesson. He urged his peers to go back to their places too, but they didn't pay him any heed, just like they did me. My face was burning as i was looking at them, faces to faces, by-hearting every mark and line on their faces. I wanted to cry not because i was angry or that they pay me no attention. I wanted to cry because i pity them. Are these the students that i want them to be, without their future, be nothing? Certainly not. I couldn't understand why they are throwing their lives away. Tears were building but i managed to hold them back.

Then, i walked up to the board and rubbed of those sentences on the board. When clean, i wrote
"DAH PUAS?" (Have you had enough?). All of them turned and zipped their mouths. Then i told them in a soft voice (because i am at the verge of loosing my vocals) how i felt. I asked them what their problem was, one by one they answered. Apparently, they don't have a problem. Then, i told them what the other teachers think of them, how every time the teachers would make funny faces when they know that i am off to have a class in 2 Inovasi. I told them as well that i want to see some changes. I asked them to go back and look into the mirror carefully. If they don't want to think about themselves, they should think about their parents and God. I told them about my experience with 2 Jujur. I told them a lot of things and somehow or rather i feel that they listened. I didn't have to raise my voice because i can't anyway due to my sore throat. Before they go back, some of them apologized to me. The class monitor, Dayani, who is like the leader of the gang (sort of) came and kiss my hands and apologized (the Muslim practice during Hari Raya to ask forgiveness from the elders).

I was touched because she listened and to a point, i think she cared about what i was feeling. Maybe she was able to read me well this time. It'd be a lie if i say that i don't love my kids. I do and even though they are rebellious and naughty. I am not going to be one of those kind of teachers who ignores the poor and focus on the excellent students only. I am going to be fair and square...if there is such thing. You know what i mean.

My first meeting

2007-07-30T05:15:00.000-07:00

Late
for the meeting
not just one but many.
Taking their sweet time
neglecting time
as if time they have plenty.

One by one
dragged themselves in
like snails hurrying.
10 minutes
faces still searching
one by one come in.

The meeting, how long?
"two hours, perhaps,
two hours".
Heads drop, hear signs
can't cope might die
two long hours.

Dream world
in we go on
napping.
Talking talking
and even more
talking.

"Attention Attention!!!"
some have gone
into another world.
Bodies in room,
thoughts afar
just like some of our
little girls.

Politics
drama despite I'm hungry
passing very slowly.
"When can we leave this meeting?"
this is my highlight of
today's story.

Playing MRS. TINGLE

2007-07-26T03:14:00.000-07:00

If you have watched the film "Teaching Mrs. Tingle", you'd know that both Katie Holmes and Helen Mirren starred in it. To sum it all up, in other words, cutting a long story short, Mrs. Tingle is a history teacher in a high school. Everyone and i mean everyone, including the principal of the school is afraid of her. The obvious reasons are that she is an elitist snob with icy stare that can give you frost bite, provocative (especially towards students) and it's pretty much one-hell-of-a-mean-bitch. What happened in the movie was a "bad boy with good looks" type of kid managed to steal the final exam's question and answer sheet. At that point of time, he was with two other class mates, one who has a huge crush on him and another who is a straight "A"s student. The straight "A"s kid was complaining about how much her grades determined her getting into a university. To take the pressure off, the"bad boy with good looks" decided to give the finals exam's paper to the straight "A"s student. The conflict starts when Mrs. Tingle caught them red handed with the exam paper. She wanted to lodge a report but the principal has already gone home. As a result, she decided to tell the principal first thing in the morning the following day. Since so much was at stake, the kids (all 3 of them) decided to go and straighten things out with Mrs. Tingle at her residence. One thing led to another and that's when the drama starts. It's a good watch actually .

Now, back to today. My day hasn't been that great. I had a class after recess with 2 Inovasi. We were supposed to cover quite a bit. We were just doing speaking on Dreams, Hopes, and Ambitions. Due to some disruptions, i got pissed. I became Tingle. Because the students were making hell of a lot of noise, i decided to have them all seated in front of the class on the floor. I gave them a good lecture for about 10 minutes about the importance of education and what they should do.

Thinking that i have had the heart to heart talk, i asked them to go back. They were ok for a while and completed a task i have printed out for them. However, when i was explaining the Grammar laws of Possessive Nouns, Adjectives, and Pronouns, a group of them started making noise again. As a result, i eyed one of them, Amirul, and called him to the front of the class. Then, i told him to teach him friends. I walked to the back and sat them. Amirul found it amusing, so he laughed and some of his friends laughed along. Then, i asked his friends to ask him questions on what i was teaching. They started asking him a lot of questions and he stood there like a fool, dumb-founded, and eventually, the laugh was over. It seems that the joke was on him. Then i ask him how he feels and he turned red. Mind you, he is very dark-skinned. Then, i asked him if he wanted to continue standing there and he shook his head. He went back to his seat, angry, but quiet. The whole class were quiet too.

I started teaching again. About 5 minutes or so, a girl, Farisha, made some noise. As i looked at her, she was reading something from the handout i have given earlier. I have warned them not to look at anything else and there she was, this little loud mouth laughing and reading something which she found amusing. I walked right in front of her and snatched the piece of paper out of her tiny hands and tear them to shreds. Mean...i know. Mean...i am. Did it feel good? Certainly not, but that stopped her from doing whatever and paid attention. I am human after all and i have my limits. I can be a friend, but i can be an enemy too. I'll just wait and see what will happen next...tomorrow. I won't be surprise if the kids skip my class.

It's just Monday and i'm already bored.

2007-07-23T03:53:00.000-07:00

Some, who are more optimistic goes on chiming to one another that today makes the third week of our teaching. They say, "It's already the 3rd week!!" with such zest in their eyes. As for me, being the cynical one, i say, "It's only the 3rd week. When will this be over??"

Don't get me wrong. It's not that i don't like teaching or that i hate waking up every morning to go to school. I do enjoy myself when i am with my kids, however good or bad they may be, but what turns me off the most (and i think all of you have to agree with me) is the paper work. Lesson plans after lesson plans. Records after records. Gosh...it's the same thing day in day out and at some point however great of a teacher one may be, one will definitely get
!!! It's the same mundane thing and it's always the specific objectives and the learning outcomes and stuff like that again again and yet again. So, when will this be over?? The profession becomes a turn off because of this. I mean what's the point of all this training when a real teacher doesn't have to write their lesson plans. Writing in the record book doesn't count, alright. It's not even a dent compared to what we (interns) have to go through.

I never understand this. If we don't have classes, why do we need to be present? On Mondays i don't have classes and I was 100% sure that they will give me a relief (a.k.a. a sit-in). However, they didn't. I feel that i have wasted a day going to school when all i did was sit around in the staff room annoying Remender. Gosh i had to get up at 5a.m. and leave by 6 and stay until 2.30p.m. By the time i get home, i am totally beat. Not from the teaching, but rather the traveling. It's 3 something when i got back and only have lunch then. It's lethargic just sitting there doing nothing, trying to amuse myself. Unfortunately i didn't succeed. I was still bored just like this

The system...

2007-07-21T08:45:00.000-07:00

Instruction: Complete the sentence with not more than five words.

The system...sucks big time. Oh yes it does!! It's unbelievable. Remender was the one who told me. It all started with the photocopy incident. She went and get the permission to photocopy her worksheets. Instead of just signing the permission note, the first assistant principal gave Remender her doubts, as if Remender was doing something illegal. Knowing this, i went and ask for permission to photocopy my task sheets. The similar thing happened. This is the conversation.

Me: Good Morning...i'd like to get your permission to photocopy these tasks sheets for my students.

1st assistant principal: (looking at my worksheet with frown lines on her forehead) Eeerrmm...everyday ke you nak photostate? Guna ke worksheet ini?

Me: (all prepared with a sarcastic smile and a synical tone) Puan rasa saya suka buat ni ke? Nak edit nak buat soalan sendiri semua ni tak senang puan. These are for the whole week. Bukan untuk hari ini saje.

1st assistant principal: Oh...kalau macam ni boleh la. Encik Andrian (can't even pronounce my name right) carilah cara lain untuk buat ye. (signing the permission note)

Me: Ok! Thanks.

It's true! Remender wasn't lying. Now, what we plan to do is get our materials ready by Monday and send them for photocopying all at one go. I am also trying to reduce the amount of photocopying made. I am going to ask the students to copy. It is time consuming but what choice do i have?? At the same time, the system sucks because it seems that no one cares. Talk about the teachers, most of them looks as if they aren't into teaching. Some have the passion, but some are in it for the benefits. From the advice they offer me you know that they don't really care. So, can you blame the students for being such disrupts in the school? No one gives them attention. Therefore, they are like wild unruly hounds. Their actions are showing that they need help. As for discipline wise, no one take measured actions to curb their wildness. No one teach them how to behave and act properly. Those who skip classes are no being punished and all i am hearing is talk talk talk and more talk. Unfortunately, they don't do what they preach. Actions are not taken. It all goes back to people not caring and playing as if all is cool when everything is far from cool. The students are a projection of the teachers. I intend to do something for this few months that i am at there.

P/S: For proactive solutions, I think we need to watch films like...

Trick or treat??

2007-07-21T07:03:00.000-07:00

Both actually!!
It all depends on which classes i go into. If i am in 2 Jujur, they are a joy to teach. Like i mentioned, they are so willing to learn. Despite little chit-chats here and there, they are ok. I don't have to be stern, but i have to be prepared. This class harbours children who score nothing but excellence in their spelling, rewarded for their every-growing bombastic vocabulary, and gain extra points for their knowledge of the grammar rules. I really have fun teaching them and they hand in their work on time. So, for me, the extra effort i put in is worth my while. This for me is a treat like ice-cream on a hot sunny day or a foot rub at the end of a marathon.

2 Inovasi is a torture and really challenging. They are such misfits. I had a class with them on one of the days and out of 19, only 6 were present. I was furious because they had the nerve to escape my class. Damn them for pulling these pranks and disguising as students who are actually professional tricksters. Right in front of my very eyes, they vandalize the tables and walls with graffiti by using markers. They love laughing, especially when they make mistakes and i find it silly because they are only making fools out of themselves. With my "teacher-ly" stare, pouty lips, and loud voice which display a sense of anger and annoyance, the children of the corn dare not rebel. They are afraid of me. I am strict. I am pissed. I am feared. That gives me power and i love it. Even so, they are like magicians with tricks up their sleeves.

Week one: Hell raiser!

2007-07-13T23:29:00.000-07:00

Oh my gosh...i am so glad that today is Saturday!! It has been a long week and it hasn't been easy. Zits are breaking out on my face and i am stressing myself out too much. I just want to do my best, but sometimes, i forget that we have limitations. I forget that we are human after all.

Well, here's what you should know. I am teaching form 2. I have two classes- 2 jujur and 2 inovasi/ tabah. Jujur is a good class while inovasi is the total opposite. Here's a little something you need to know about the students. They come from two distinctive classes. One from very rich families, and two, from very poor families. The rich ones mostly occupy the good classes, while the poor ones conquer the bad classes. I am taking over Pn. Lim's classes. She has just been promoted as the extra-curriculum advisor.

My kids in jujur are like form 4 kids, most of them anyway. They are really the MTV generation kind of kids. They speak using all the "DUHs" and "Whatevers". I feel like i have stepped into the screen sometimes, like a part of the cast of "Mean girls", "Bring it on", and "A cinderella story". It's fun but to a certain degree, it's intimidating. However, i am glad to say that behind that mischief they have under their noses, they are pretty mature and polite. I guess their parents have taught them well. I really enjoy teaching that class. The students have that learning fire in their eyes which makes my efforts worth-while.

Two Ino on the other hand is...ermmm...how do i put this?? DIFFICULT!! There is only 19 of them, but for the past one week, i have only met 16 of them. Some really want to study, but some aren't interested at all. I mean who comes to school empty-bag, with no pencils and books?? Hello?? What's the point of coming into the class if they don't want to study?? What are their parents doing about it? What are the teachers doing about it? It's frustrating to teach students like that. Since i have to simply their tasks for them and print out handouts, they don't seem to appreciate it by throwing their handouts (which i have slaved over to make) on the floor. That pisses me off. I am mad, but i need to deal. Somebody out they give me suggestions...please. I have teachers telling me to ignore them and focus on those who wants to learn. I can't do that. I am not going to be one of those teachers. This is a challenge and i really wanna see them improve.

As for just beeing there for a week, i have decided not to teach...not yet anyway and definately not in schools. There are just so much work. after school especially. I so wanna persue my music stuff!!

Teacher in STYLE!!

2007-07-08T04:05:00.000-07:00

Tell you what...let's just forget about the whole "spiky hair" drama, shall we?? I exaggerated a bit there so, let's just forget about it for the time being. Teacher in style, anything wrong with that?? I sure don't want to be stereotyped as one of those teachers, you know, unfashionable, outdated, a spoil-sport. I mean, i want to look good for myself because it's all about presentation, isn't it?? I have heard this one too many times by my lecturers telling me that the moment you step into the classroom, you become and actor. Tomorrow is my first day and i am so nervous just thinking about it. I am going to be busy, that's for sure, but nothing is going to stop this teacher from looking his best. Here are some of the clothes i have bought. I need more actually!!

So, what do you think?? Do i look like your typical teacher??

A visit

2007-07-06T09:12:00.000-07:00

Ah yes…Reminder and I have pay the school a visited- SMK. Bukit Bandaraya Bangsar! We just wanted to “check it out” and we’ve only managed to see the first assistant principal and some of the English teachers. They are friendly and nice and fast too, in pointing out that my spiky hair isn’t allowed. What pisses me the most is-what does my hair got to do with my performance?? I have managed to steal a glimpse or two at the students who were hanging at the corridors and I have found out that they have Mohawks and other funky hairstyles. What?? Did they saw me and gone to the toilet and decided to spike their hair to another level of extremity?? Give me a break with all the “can/ can’t”. I mean if you are one hell of a good teacher, you should be able to get through to the students no matter what your hairstyle is.

In moral classes, we can teach students such values like respect and tolerance. However, when it comes to real life situations, we tell them to discriminate. Do they actually think that a spiky hairstyle is going to influence the students to flunk in their exams?? What about respect for individuality?? What about respecting me?? It is bad enough that I have to take off my piercing, but to ask me to change my hairstyle is something not acceptable. This sucks big time…and that’s why I am not going to work in the teaching line…hypocrites. I am not going to bow to this. It’s silly! It’s stupid! It’s Gibberish! It’s hilarious! No wonder discrimination happens…who is to be blamed?? It all has got to start from some where, doesn’t it?

Put the Gel and hairstyle aside, I am still excited. I am unsure of what form I will be teaching, but I would like to meet the kids, however bad they are-BRING IT ON!! All I want is to get this internship done and over with. Nothing is going to stop me from success, certainly not some irrelevant rules.

P/S: To everyone else, let’s show them who we are. Don’t loose yourself!!

Let's start from the very beginning

2007-06-30T07:59:00.000-07:00

When we sing we begin with do-re-mi, when we read we begin with A-B-C...so that's where i got the name of my blog from. It's short for Addy Board + Chalk= ABC. Now that i've gotten that bit sorted out, i am going to tell you about what this blog is for. It is for "recording" my experiences whilst my internship. From the 9th of July until the 28th of September, 2007, i will be teaching with my partner, Ms. Reminder Kaur, in Smk. Bukit Bandaraya Bangsar, Kuala Lumpur. I excited as well as nervous because i don't know what it is like working in a real school.

In the past, i have done my share of tutoring, but this is different. This time, i'm teaching in a real school with real teachers with a real system. I am finally going to work (all grown up). I haven't seen the school yet, nor have i met anyone there. I will soon, hopefully!! Watching "The freedom writers" starring Hilary Swank, i got really worried about the students' discipline and their level of eagerness in learning. I know i am not in America and our kids aren't that dangerous, but the whole unexpectedness of it scares me. I recall similar films like the musical "Sister act"- prankers rule the class rooms, "Dangerous minds"- gangsterism is the main issue in the school, "Teaching Mrs. Tingle"- an unfriendly teacher freaks her students out, and "The music of my heart"- makes me want to be a good teacher who is able to reach out and deal with whatever problems are there to deal with. I want to see that my kids will pull through while i am teaching there.

*Deep breath*...no labour pain-Check~ DUH!!
I am just worked up even before the whole thing begins. I just attended my workshop and my supervisor is Pn. Huzaina...she has been really nice and helpful. She told us that we might have to extend our practical since there are holidays...oh lord i hope not!! I want to go home...i am missing it already. I have nothing to do for this one week and it's very boring. Should have skipped the workshop...